Calling people "Dear"


#1

Using “Dear” in place of someone’s name/username is very colloquial and I thought this would help some sellers with their communication :wink:

GOOD USES:

  • “Dear seller”
  • “Dear buyer”
  • “Dear NAME” (example: Dear Bob)
  • “Dear USERNAME” (example: Dear Bob1989)

NOT GOOD:

  • “Hi Dear”
  • “Yes Dear”
  • “No Dear”

Using a person’s username or actual name is a better choice than simply calling them Dear (it’s much more appropriate), and it will help you build a relationship with clients.


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#2

I encourage everyone to read this informative article on this subject:


#3

They don’t know that in some locations native en women hate this word because it has another meaning - old (I’ve read it from one UK lady long ago as I remember)


#4

Interesting, thanks for sharing :slight_smile:

Here’s an answer from that link:
“Indian here. So I’ve been called ‘dear’ in some situations where it felt weird. And in all of them, the speaker was mostly trying to communicate familiarity and affection … ‘dear’ is probably an attempt to showcase their affection for you. They just don’t know that such usage is uncommon and that there are other phrases to convey the same emotion.”

Since it is very uncommon amongst English speakers, I thought it would still be a handy tip to pass on for sellers who are just starting out. The first time I outsourced work, I was called “dear” and then I slowly realized a lot of ESL speakers use it in that form.

I would much prefer my name/username to be used in place of it and I think most other buyers would, too.


#5

Post could help many buyers, sellers and those who are baffled by the use of “dear” with strangers.


#6

###Good tips DEAR! :thumbsup:


#7

Oh, really? I’ve had many situations like the following: “Hi dear, please cancel this, I want my money back because this is not what I expected”

Where’s the affection or emotion in that? :unamused:

People started overusing “dear” up to the point where they probably forgot the reason they started using it in the first place, and now it’s become a contradiction of some sort, or a useless annoyance (sometimes making it even worse when improperly used)


#8

I am really glad this has been brought up. I always feel weird when someone writes “hi dear”. :slight_smile:Good post!


#9

Usually, most of the time I try not to work with clients/sellers that overuse the word “dear”, I call them the “dears clan” and in most of the cases I had bad experiences.


#10

Oh, dear, not the “dear”, dear. Dear me, this dear thing is not dear to me.


#11

To native English speakers having a stranger call you dear sounds inappropriate. It makes me cringe when it happens. Is a male ever called dear or just females? If it’s just females then it sounds like a way of putting women in their place and making them feel they are seen as inferiors rather than equals. It’s also very superficial.


#12

I’m male, and I’m being called “dear” way too often… maybe, in my case, female buyers call me “dear” to make me feel inferior :smiley:


#13

Using “Dear” is no show of affection but an annoying habit, mainly from South Asia. Funny thing is it is always used in written communication but never in spoken! Never once did I hear someone approaching a stranger in India and say “Dear”.

Then again, I find the words “bro” and “mate” just as annoying from Western counterparts. :wink:


#14

Any buyer never called me dear :smiley:
but some time it happens that we call each other ‘BRO’, almost 70-80%my buyers uses this word and I am too for them!
but always uses USERNAME when not sure about their gender :smiley:


#15

Some people from South Asia called me “bro”. And yes, it’s just as annoying, although it’s not as creepy as being called “dear”.

Understandable. Approach a man and call him “Dear” and you might get punched in the face.:stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:


#16

Nice play of words!!


#17

Thank you. :slight_smile:


#18

Would you allow me to copy paste this sentence to the next person that “dears” me? I really wanna know what they are going to say.


#19

They’re probably just going to say “ok dear” :smiley:


#20

Oh dear, this again :smiley:
To me it always feels weird when random people call me dear / darling etc. especially because I only call my close friends something similar (I’m more of a hon / bae / female dog kind of person anyway :smiley: ) I think these habits are not harmful THERE in their countries but on the internet working with people who have well, different opinions on these words… it’s best for everyone to look up the proper greetings. On the other hand I would understand why it doesn’t even occur to them that some people are annoyed slash offended, but… when you use the English language, use the rules of the English language. (or to say it the classy way, when in Rome do as the Romans do… which mean no cappuccino in the afternoon…
oh dear :frowning: