Fiverr Community Forum

Entering the Jungle that is Buyer Requests

I’ve decided to enter the jungle, I’m armed with a machete and insect spray.

(Technically my machete is an antique Nepalese Kukri but it’s still insanely dangerous in the wrong / right hands)

Quote Guns ‘n’ Roses:

Welcome to the jungle, we’ve got fun and games
We got everything you want honey, we know the names
We are the people that can find whatever you may need
If you got the money, honey we got your disease

I need my site’s style sheet sorting out so it looks better than that basic out of the box Bootstrap feeling, I will keep this post updated with screenshot of the nonsense people send me, and yes, I will edit the names to protect the guilty.

I want to get experience of the Jungle, I’m already dreading the responses!

Here’s my request:

Hello, DO NOT MESSAGE ME DIRECT - only reply through this buyer request. I am looking for someone with Bootstrap CSS customisation skills.

I’m building an e-commerce enabled site with Bootstrap, Jquery, Jquery UI and Font Awesome. I can craft HTML and PHP myself, I can code and do all the back end and payment integration stuff needed. I don’t need a coder, I don’t need a website designing, or building, I’ve done that, I just need the CSS to make it all pretty.

I would like someone to create an override CSS sheet with a more custom feel than the out of the box Bootstrap CSS. I don’t want people to see my site and think “Bootstrap”. I need overrides of the text, backgrounds, buttons, badges, alerts etc so they’re not using the default colour schemes.

Please submit examples of CSS driven Bootstrap interfaces you’ve created.

I’m called Andy, don’t call me Sir, don’t call me dear, don’t call me Ma’am, don’t tell me you understand what I want, demonstrate it by sending me links to work which will impress me, don’t send me cut and paste stuff, you will only offend me.

This may be used in the forum to demonstrate how buyer requests work. You have been warned, be on your best behaviour as I will be taking screenshots and writing about my experience here :wink:

Please submit links, a quote and timeframe. I’ll let you know if I like you and like your work, and if I think we can work together.
Thanks
Andy

I’m waiting for:

Hello Dear Sir, I am an app developer, I understand your request, I will build your e-commerce engine.

Dear Ma’am / Sir, I am unpronounceable, my dog is not well, my tummy is hungry, my wife left me for our brother, I need sell, I do your logo design perfect, I am a expart.

Please, please, please may I be wrong…

For those wondering: it took about two hours for my request to be published.

Let’s see what madness unfolds.

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Are you a developer ?

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If I was a perfect fit for the services you were seeking and ran across your offer, I’d ignore the request due to the overall less-than-friendly tone and possibility of being publicly ridiculed, but that’s just me! :wink:

Yes, buyer requests is a raging dumpster fire full of trash requests and offers, but I think a more tactful balance between knowing and detailing exactly what you want while still having an overall approachable/friendly tone is important in order to not scare away experienced/talented sellers who might assume you are a potential nightmare client just from your perceived demeanor.

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My background is broadcast radio, admin, production and presentation through to senior management, the tech aspect of radio led me into web development, so yes I can code, but only do it on my own projects.

Have built a multitude of things over the years: ringtone platforms, music download and streaming platforms, online radio stations, streaming server admin panels, more billing integrations than you can shake a stick at; literally, had premium SMS integrations in about 24 countries, WAP payments in several and premium rate phone lines in a few countries too.

How I miss ringtone revenue, woke every day to easy money from automated new customers, that’s till the Crazy Frog murdered the entire mobile download industry…

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Tact is over rated.

Diplomacy is overrated.

Sometimes the tact and diplomacy of a nuclear bomb is needed.

I’m not bothered about how I’m perceived, nor I don’t give a flying about people’s “feelings”.

It has begun:

Hello, My name is _____. I’m energetic, passionate website designer and developer. I have two years experience on freelancer. I’m will design a high converting professional landing page, for you using HTML, CSS, Bootstrap, JavaScript, jQuery, etc with all device & screen sizes compatible and 100% Satisfaction guarantee. I hope you will work with me, Waiting for you response. Thanks and Regards.

A landing page? Are they stupid? (Rhetorical question) Where did I say I wanted a landing page?

This idiot doesn’t even know what freelancing site they’re on. Freelancer?

Hi, How are you? Upon reading brief details I believe its a doable job I have great experience doing projects with WordPress PHP, C Programming, Python, Software Architecture and C++ Programming. I am confident about getting this done. While I believe we need to have detailed discussion about it. I work as per Eastern time daily so that would be good for us to catch up on this job, Lets discuss this further and get started for you as soon as possible. Thanks! _____

Not a single mention of CSS, not a single mention of Bootstrap.

Maybe I should rename this thread “how to not win a buyer request”.

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I never mentioned diplomacy, but I guess approachability and friendliness are also potentially overrated?

If they are, then I shouldn’t be surprised if people want to stay far away from me or want to sock me in the face as I am snarling angrily and looking bug-eyed at everyone in my vicinity.

I can rattle off a number of platitudes such as “perception equals reality” or “can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar” but I estimate you may possibly “perceive” that as insulting your intelligence!

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I was actually just looking through the buyer requests and I saw your request!! That’s kind of funny!

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This one made me laugh:

Let’s design a unique creative and professional website for you as you described in description … 70% of people use websites on mobile … your website will be user-friendly and easy to navigate … i will send you my portfolio if you are interested … waiting for your response

70% of people browse on a mobile? This dude is preaching to the converted, understandably unaware I was a High Priest of the Church of Mobile Web.

Wants to create a unique site for me when I have already built the site.

No reference to CSS.

Why would I do anything other than hit the reject button?

Hello, I’m _____ I’m a full-time Full-Stack developer. For your project, After reviewing the requirements, I’m confident in being able to design your website using css and bootstrapp easily. I can add/develop all required and new feature. I worked with WordPress and WooCommerce and php have more than 2+ years’ experience. I have extensive experience in designing , developing , optimizing and ultimately delivering modern web-sites (and custom themes). I am proficient in HTML-5,CSS-3,Bootstrap,Javscript,jQuery,WordPress,WooCommerce,PHP and laravel. Thank you for your time and consideration. Thanks

$100

No thanks. Too much off topic irrelevancy, as in I don’t care about Woo etc…Show me, don’t tell me. Wants to write new features for platforms I don’t use.

Another, this time $350 - on something I’ll pay $50 for, they sent a portfolio but not a single Bootstrap CSS job.

Hi, I am _____. I just saw your post that you want a bootstrap css expert to make customization. Well I’ve interested on your project and I can help you to do this work with all the requirements you have ask for. I am confident to complete the task within your price and timeframe. I’m a expert bootstrap css developer and graphics designer have expertise on delivering quality web/desktop/mobile design, website, plugin, api, api integration, web and mobile application development using wordpress, php, javascript, angular, react, bootstrap, html, css etc. You will get some amazing experience in my service. You will be amaze by my quality of work, that’s promise! Let me know if I can help you out in this. Looking forward to assist you with my service. If you have any confusion or doubt or anything, please ask me. I will respond you ASAP! Regards, _____

“Expert” oh god, here we go: mobile, why mention this when I use a responsive framework? There’s loads of junk I don’t care about like angular, react, plugins etc.

“Within your price” - err, you’re seven times higher than I want to pay. Hello, hello, is there anybody in there, just knock if you can hear, is there anyone at home???

Reject.
Reject.
Reject.

@enunciator why would anyone want to catch flies? :wink:

The kind of response I’m hoping for would go like this:

Hi Andy, saw your request, done loads of Bootstrap CSS jobs in the past, I’ve loads of different stylesheets ready for you to test, URL1 URL2 URL3, because I already have these to hand, and I can’t see many changes being required from your BR, I can do this under budget, and well ahead of schedule as the files are ready to be downloaded once you’ve approved and selected a sheet to work with.

I can dream… Will most likely end up using Bootstrap Magic and doing it myself…

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I do honestly think so.

It’s business, I don’t want friends, I want people who are ruthlessly efficient.

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Didn’t mean to potentially derail your thread.

I find the premise interesting and potentially entertaining. Just wanted to chime in with an insight in that you may very well not get the absolute best candidates sending offers due to how the request might be inferred.

-Edit: Nix on finding the thread potentially entertaining. The commentary is quickly becoming more and more mean-spirited.

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We sort of had a contender for a moment:

Hi Andy wanted to tell you that i am professional front end Web Developer I have work as a front end developer with a software company for almost 1year my skills are bootstrap if you want a quality work then ping and i will send you my bootstrap work My Previous Web Projects URL URL URL URL URL

I replied to this gentleman to say thanks, I congratulated them on the best message so far but explained I would have to reject as all their examples were WordPress and Shopify, so sadly didn’t demonstrate the skills I wanted to see.


Hi there, Here I am a creative ecommerce Product Reacher to help you out in creating stunning ecommerce Product Reacher identifying your business. Get in touch to have a unique Product for your business.

What the hell is a “product reacher”?

Can I call myself a product reacher if I reach into my cupboard and take out a product?

I already have a unique product for my business, sighs…

This one wanted $5

design front end only HTML safely
greeting andy hope you are enjoying your life, I will customize css for your project, then your project looking very beautiful eye-catching and modern

Sorry but five bucks is too little. I can’t take that seriously.

Hello My name is _____. I have read your project description need to Additions to current website. .My skills are: * PSD to HTML * PSD to HTML Responsive * PSD to Bootstrap * Java script * Photoshop *HTML5 *CSS3 *js * Make existing website responsive and pass Google Mobile-Friendly Test My code is: * All Browsers Supported * 100% Responsive * Clean and Commented I like what I do and I enjoy of my work result. Hire me and you will get great work! Please have a look at my portfolio, URL Thank you.

Jibber jabber, that’s all that is, 99% irrelevant. Rejected.

I can create a beautiful website for you using bootstrap and custom CSS so that your site won’t look like that generic bootstrap website.

Sounds brilliant but where’s the proof this person can deliver? $15, this again is too cheap, damn come on sellers, know thy worth!

convert PSD to HTML, figma to HTML, xd to HTML responsive

Where did I mention PSD? I’m getting PTSD from this.

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I’m sorry but if you’re going to enter the Buyer Request jungle, you need way more than that. Maybe a flame thrower, rocket launcher and some grenades. Maybe add a katana as a backup.
Keep us updated, and good luck leaving the jungle.
I heard there are many spiders and snakes and alligators oh my.

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I’m on my third hazmat suit already.

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If I were posting on BR I would do this,

I’m looking for a web designer to overwrite my default CSS design. CSS expert with strong UI/UX experience preferred. Please attach your portfolio sample including CSS driven Bootstrap interfaces you’ve created. My website is built with PHP* with Twitter Bootstrap.

Good Luck on your journey to the Jungle.

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Ha! What a timing!

I posted BR this morning too, accepted one offer, we talked for two hours only to tell me he made a mistake he can not deliver and cancel order.

From 50 offers only 2 actually read my offer. And I contacted one seller to clarify he did not make mistake and I am willing to go with his Premium package price, not the one he offered, and he is not replying.

And while you Andy are bringing it to forum, I decided I will make video about the whole process and types of messages I received (of course i will remove the names and all, only RELEVANT part).

This is one of the offers:

Hi dear buyer I am CAndy by name, I am a professional in this aspect you need I have been working on this for a long time now and I will give you the best as needed in your posted request Just get in touch with me and see your result.

I will give you 10$ if you guess from this offer what is the content of my BR .

be your ui ux designer for your mobile and web apps

Respected Client, I just have gone through your project description briefly and I’m interested in working with you on this project. I can easily do this project with all the requirements you ask for. I’m a professional web designer with more than 5 years of experience in this world of web designing. My main focus is to come up with new and stylish UI designs for my clients and will be responsible for the user experience also. I can include some unique features to make your web design more creative and user-friendly. I will work on your project to make it meaningful and attractive at a very low cost and you will be amazed by the quality of work. What more you will get from me? ✓ Years of experience in CSS ✓ I will provide you Unlimited Revisions ✓ I will deliver your project quickly ✓ I will satisfy you 100% with my work ✓ Free source file ✓ Friendly communication ✓ Affordable price And many more! So if you are interested and if you have any confusion Let me know before placing the order. Thank you Regards, ____

Respect client = slimy, it sends shivers down my spine, and not in a good way!

Unlimited revisions? I could hire this one and make them my pet, changing my mind every minute… Why offer to do that to yourself? People must not understand the implications of their offers.

@wp_kid how about you post your version and we do a compare and contrast on the responses?

@marinapomorac - I’ll give you ten bucks if you can make my head stop hurting from the allergic reactions I’m having to folks with single digit IQ scores.

Actually, we should both formally retract those statements, wouldn’t want Fiverr to think we’re planning on eloping to an outside transaction!

:wink:

It is recommended that once in a while you turn in to buyer mode to see the experience buyer has when buying gig, like what window does he get, what questions are being asked before during and after the order, so you can advance.

The best thing about the offers I got is that they all want me to contact them, none of them actualy said: This offer includes this and tis at that price and delivery time.

Now,
image
What is he selling?

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Excellent advice. Some of the most sensible words published here. Know thy marketplace!

I’ll be buying from a VO at some point soon so I have a up to date understanding of how it works from that side.

With a gig title like that, I suspect they’re not selling anything!

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