Fiverr Forum

From September 2019 to January 2020

Someone messaged me in September last year asking if I do web content. Naturally, I said yes. However, I urged this person to try and tell me what they want. They responded by saying they were a digital marketing agency. I responded with:

Hi,

I’m sorry, but your brief seems very scattered. Digital marketing is an expansive topic, You need to succinctly beak down what exactly you plan on offering with your agency. You also ideally need to target a local area/region. I say this, as it is not going to be possible to get a new digital marketing agency website global search exposure.

It is also not really in your interest to plan on publishing a 1,500-word landing page. Few people read beyond 330 words (approx) before clicking away to find a more succinctly presented information. In this case, I’d advise you to plan what pages you need and consider who your target audience is.

i.e. Few people search for ‘digital marketing.’ However, people do search for terms under the umbrella of digital marketing like “how do I market my business on FB,” etc. As a result, you need to list what you actually do under the umbrella of digital marketing, then plan your page structure accordingly.

I hope that this helps.

Kind Regards,

Andy

Later in November, this person resumed messaging. Sadly, they were still only able to communicate "I am digital marketing agency."

In this case, I responded with:

Hi,

I’m sorry, the best I can advise is that you get your url and website created and then simply list exactly what pages you need copy creating for. You can use placeholder content when you do create your site to give me an idea of the layout.

Alternatively, maybe consider looking for another seller who can devote more time to your project in the form of more back and forth communication and direct collaboration.

Kind Regards,

Andy

Fast forward 2-months and I get this:

Hi Andy, How are you doing?

I have created a clear website plan and I would like to improve the content.

Would you please take look

And this is followed by this:

the plan

Now can someone explain what buyers find so hard when it comes to communicating? Is it some kind of brain infection? At this point, I’m literally flabberghasted.

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We give them too much credit sometimes and forget not everyone is educated. I’m used to it by now. Sometimes I try to explain things but less and less lately and just try to ignore it all and stay agreeable as much as I can.

I get the same type of thing where they come back once a month or every other month, I answer or explain, then they disappear again. Until the next time. And start all over.

A few have been doing this for a couple of years.

I don’t think they read what I tell them so it really doesn’t matter if I say anything at all.

Here is one I got:

The offer is costly, I have tried and paid spell casters but nothing worked, please offer me something reasonable, if it works even a bit I’ll pay you for further services

Whenever they say that I ask where they got the previous spellcasters they tried, and it’s NEVER on fiverr, not once. They always have new accounts.

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Some people are convinced that they have a clear idea and that they’re providing you with enough information even though they’re just vaguely saying “I want you to write something about how I’m the best at (thing) and how I have many satisfied customers”. They seem to honestly think that “write something about” is specific enough.

It was sort of fun when someone wanted me to write about their product, I asked about the specifics, and they said “Just write something about drones.” Wait, you want me to write about your specific product, but to just write something about drones at the same time?

I mean, sure, I can write something, but my something could easily be very, very different from what they wanted.

As soon as I see the words “write something about” or “it should say something about” I know that they’re a lost cause, and that they just won’t get it no matter how many times I try to explain.

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That type of thing happened to me last night. A customer wants to do marketing on social media for their upcoming brand launch. I asked if they have social media pages set up and ready for advertising? They said yes but they didn’t know about how to be ready for advertising. I provide them some info and asked for the URLs of their social media pages. Then they said… okay we want to do that and I share my gig with them which includes completely set up all the pages, but then they replied with "Okay but we already have a page, cant pay you for that. At this moment, I asked for their social media handles for at least 3 times so I can see and suggest some things, but no, Nothing!

Some peoples just don’t know how things work. At last, I just said “Ok.” (which means just go and don’t disturb me). I never want to leave a potential customer like this but if I do that it will just become too much hassle for me and telling them each thing, guiding them, and that would not worth anything.

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I’ve noticed that for certain projects on Fiverr, there’s more of an attitude of ‘I can have a random idea while I’m in the shower, and just dump that idea with no further context on some freelancer, and they’ll turn that idea into reality for me’.

In voice over, we avoided that mentality. You can’t really get away with it in VO, we need a script. No script, no order. But we recently moved into video creation, and yeesh… :grimacing:

We had a chap yesterday who said he wanted us to build a 1 minute video that clearly explained his product (a web portal which, right now, I still can’t tell you what it is/does). He said it needed to be punchy and get the message across as quickly as possible to prospective buyers. He wanted us to write the script for him. No problem, we offer that service… so I asked him for the elevator pitch of what the product is/does, as I figured this would be an obvious place to start. I waited for what I expected would be a paragraph at most to be sent back.

He then proceeds to send us a 48 page technical document PDF, along with a 36 page sales and marketing PDF, and says “probably easier if you work through these”. This is before an order has been created btw.

We politely declined.

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That reminds me of someone who sent me a 30 page sales copy and wanted me to write them a 1 minute video script.

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And I thought it was bad when I get a full page story, in minute details, of a romance gone bad. Which happens at least once a day and has no possible need for me to see, nor is that ever requested by me at any time.

People write up their failed romance stories in great detail and fire them off to dozens of sellers in my category at once apparently.
There are probably some sellers who will chat at length about them without an order.

These stories all follow the same theme oddly enough:

  1. Someone is involved with someone who also has a wife or girlfriend already, but they both love each other a lot.

  2. They want the other person, their rival, removed once and for all.

  3. Someone has put a spell on the romantic interest to hold the person with the rival. The person writing to me wants that spell removed.

  4. They have tried many other spellcasters but none of the spells have worked. None of those spellcasters are on fiverr.

The person sending me the story has a new fiverr account.
They want a detailed response from me.

1 Like

If you’d left it at that as a cliffhanger, I might have risked a bet that after this there’d come a plot twist and this person actually wanted to digitally market you :smiley:

As there wasn’t a plot twist, though, … good luck, I guess.