I will give you a Satanic Tarot card reading!


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Get the right answers, right now. Purchase my gig today and I’ll give you a complete reading for your specific question and deliver the best answer the first time. I’ll even give you my money-back guarantee: if you don’t understand your reading, I’ll refund your order. Please review my business policies in the preview gallery to learn who I am as a reader and how you can make the most of my reading style.

Your Tarot card reading will be delivered as a private, unlisted YouTube video so only you can see the cards and enjoy the intimacy of a real conversation!

What, you might ask, is a Satanic Tarot card reading?

Satan is a multi-faceted metaphor for the carnal qualities of mankind. Satan is not a lens through which one sees the world, but instead it is the world itself, as it really exists, with no lenses to filter what is seen.

The definition of Satan is broad enough to include volumes of research, but its essence can be reduced to the words of Popeye: “I am what I am and that’s all that I am.” Likewise, the world is what it is and that’s all that is. As an extension of this naturalist truth, Satan is not a literal deity, only a metaphor to poetically illustrate man-as-animal and evident reality.

Our Earth and all that live upon it are beautiful enough that they don’t require exaltation, yet also carnal enough that they don’t require damnation. Satan is the pendulum that swings between these two poles, and those who take its name strive to live as successfully as possible on this spectrum of chaos and order.

In that sense, a Satanic Tarot reading embraces self-determination and shuns fatalism. The past is done, and cannot be raised from the dead. Learn what lessons can be had from past history, but those who live in the past are condemned to death. The future is unwritten, and while some patterns are stronger than others, no patterns are certain. The only surety is the present, but even it changes from moment to moment.

For these reasons, a Satanic Tarot reading considers neither the past, nor the future, and places the greatest emphasis on seeing your world and the people in it as they really are: take responsibility for yourself; reward those who deserve your love; and scorn those who deserve your wrath!

Use this knowledge to create change in accordance with your will.


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