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Just had one of those buyers! How's your Friday night going?

So I just had one of those buyers.
You know the type, really poor command of English but are convinced they are fluent, completely change the brief after delivery and lose their minds when you point out that as good a writer as you are, predicting complete brief changes are beyond your capabilities.

So I’ve been subjected to a torrent of fairly unpleasant abuse and I’m now awaiting the inevitable raging 1 star review with bated breath.

On the plus side it’s Friday night and I’ve just opened a fantastic bottle of red wine.
So, how is everyone else’s Friday night shaping up (time zones allowing)


Alas, this website will turn each and every one of us into Earnest Hemingway.

I will never understand the mentality of buyers who aren’t fluent in English and expect you to miraculously curate content without direction. The easiest way I have found to deter most is to send them a questionnaire if they message me prior to ordering. The majority of people messaging me then go silent. I then imagine them rocking back and forth muttering “what does this all mean?” as they ponder each question.

(They are very basic questions like: Please describe what your business does.)

When people order directly, it is impossible to avoid an eventual temper tantrum. I don’t turn to the vino myself. However, I usually state in my review of a buyer that they don’t seem to understand what they want.

Once I was asked to write a description for a drone being sold on eBay. The buyer had used software to scan similar listing pages for keywords. Keywords they asked me to include subsequently included words for completely unrelated products like air rifles. The buyer simply couldn’t understand how including these would be detrimental to their listing. In the end, I acquiesced to their maniacal brief and they left a 5-star review. I doubt they ever sold a drone, though. :slight_smile:


Unfortunately this was a direct order. We’re now enjoying a game of cancellation request tennis with the buyer becoming increasingly outlandish in his reasoning.

I’ve worked with a lot of buyers who struggle with English and when they acknowledge it and are humble about their ability I have no problem. It’s the buyers who can’t string a coherent sentence together and believe they are fluent that always cause issues. The arrogance and delusion are astounding sometimes.


Haha I once had someone who really struggled with English order my voice over with a script that they had written in ‘Scottish dialect’ :rofl: It was unreadable. Thankfully they were happy for me to rework it