So the world didn't end

[prroducer99plus]

I know a lot of you have been here a while so I’m sure you have some stories of weird gigs you fulfilled. Mine is not that weird but it’s the closest I’ve come as far as interesting.

Earlier in the month someone purchased my gig for me to edit and clear their audio. File was usable and she was pretty pleasant to work with. It was all good… it was only weird because the file was an hour long ramble of her explaining biblically why the world would end on September 23rd, 2017 (Yay we lived). I don’t want to say anything about her voice but that in conjunction with the topic was odd.

[theslackjaw]

My two are these:

1. Apparently I’m the voice of a personal massage product that speaks to it’s users (sensually) while they use it. My wife got a big laugh out of that one. (To look at me I’m more Homer Simpson than Fabio.)

2. I had a guy contact me to be the voices for a “personal” project of his where he was animating porn using popular anime characters. I declined because of the whole TOS violation situation. (He sent me his animatic…wow. It was…graphic. Apparently it had a vore theme to it. DO NOT GOOGLE THAT WITH SAFE SEARCH OFF IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS.) Dude found my email and tried to get me to do it off of Fiverr. I declined again…

[prroducer99plus]

My two are these:

1. Apparently I’m the voice of a personal massage product that speaks to it’s users (sensually) while they use it. My wife got a big laugh out of that one. (To look at me I’m more Homer Simpson than Fabio.)

2. I had a guy contact me to be the voices for a “personal” project of his where he was animating porn using popular anime characters. I declined because of the whole TOS violation situation. (He sent me his animatic…wow. It was…graphic. Apparently it had a vore theme to it. DO NOT GOOGLE THAT WITH SAFE SEARCH OFF IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS.) Dude found my email and tried to get me to do it off of Fiverr. I declined again…

1. Sensually of course XD

2A. Now I want to google it… with safe search off

2B. The whole email fiasco is creepy…

Yeah you got me beat 😂

Edit: Urban dictionary gave me a general idea of what vore is. I’ve decided the head your warning. 😥

[theslackjaw]

1. Sensually of course XD

2A. Now I want to google it… with safe search off

2B. The whole email fiasco is creepy…

Yeah you got me beat 😂

Edit: Urban dictionary gave me a general idea of what vore is. I’ve decided the head your warning. 😥

Yeah, you get all kinds here. But it makes for a fun “guess what happened to me…” to tell at parties…

[theslackjaw]

1. Sensually of course XD

2A. Now I want to google it… with safe search off

2B. The whole email fiasco is creepy…

Yeah you got me beat 😂

Edit: Urban dictionary gave me a general idea of what vore is. I’ve decided the head your warning. 😥

I forgot to mention about the Personal Massage product. The buyer gave no indication what the project was about. They just sent me 20 or so phrases and told me to “Be Sexy.” Apparently I was.

Two month later I get a message, “Hey, thought you’d be interested in seeing the final product.” Sent me a link. I think I laughed for 10 minutes straight. I couldn’t believe it.

[prroducer99plus]

I forgot to mention about the Personal Massage product. The buyer gave no indication what the project was about. They just sent me 20 or so phrases and told me to “Be Sexy.” Apparently I was.

Two month later I get a message, “Hey, thought you’d be interested in seeing the final product.” Sent me a link. I think I laughed for 10 minutes straight. I couldn’t believe it.

Keep those phrases in you back pocket clearly you pulled them off XD

Fiverr forum is honestly hilarious, I’d love to be in the room when any seasoned fiverr seller started spilling their stories 😂

[eoinfinnegan]

I had a request today to help market hunting holidays etc in Europe. I took a look at their promo videos and that was enough for me.
I am sure that is fine for some people but I had to tell the buyer that I was not the best person for this.

Funny enough, working on the projects mentioned above would be ok for me, aside from the lack of a sexy voice.

[prroducer99plus]

I had a request today to help market hunting holidays etc in Europe. I took a look at their promo videos and that was enough for me.

I am sure that is fine for some people but I had to tell the buyer that I was not the best person for this.

Funny enough, working on the projects mentioned above would be ok for me, aside from the lack of a sexy voice.

I mean I know sex sells but come on does a hunting holiday really need sexy vocals XD

[eoinfinnegan]

I mean I know sex sells but come on does a hunting holiday really need sexy vocals XD

Of course, they make everything better - you should suggest it to your end of the world person when they come back for their sequel; 2019 Rulez! But For How Long…

[somaginer1996]

Of the orders I actually completed, I don’t have anything that’s super weird. I did rewrite someone’s fetish story once. It was…quite graphic.

I do really want to know about how some requests in the BR section were eventually completed though. Most of the really weird stuff comes up in the creative writing section. I can’t think of anything that’s outright bizzare off the top of my head (aka so outlandish that I couldn’t even explain it), but one that always stuck with me was an extremely detailed outline of a children’s story that went from whimsical to a super heavy-handed moral tale about the goods of traditional families and the evils of divorces and single parents.

Then, of course, there’s all the fetish stuff, whether it’s about sexy wrestling, humiliating genderbending superheroes, and the classic dead girls’ feet. I wonder if those people ever find a writer who can do their fetishes justice. From what I’ve seen, erotica and horror seem to be in pretty high demand, at least among the people who approach me.

[prroducer99plus]

Of the orders I actually completed, I don’t have anything that’s super weird. I did rewrite someone’s fetish story once. It was…quite graphic.

I do really want to know about how some requests in the BR section were eventually completed though. Most of the really weird stuff comes up in the creative writing section. I can’t think of anything that’s outright bizzare off the top of my head (aka so outlandish that I couldn’t even explain it), but one that always stuck with me was an extremely detailed outline of a children’s story that went from whimsical to a super heavy-handed moral tale about the goods of traditional families and the evils of divorces and single parents.

Then, of course, there’s all the fetish stuff, whether it’s about sexy wrestling, humiliating genderbending superheroes, and the classic dead girls’ feet. I wonder if those people ever find a writer who can do their fetishes justice. From what I’ve seen, erotica and horror seem to be in pretty high demand, at least among the people who approach me.

I do sometimes read buyer requests and see someone actually offered a gig to complete whatever weird task was asked. And then I get tempted message the seller just to see the weird finished product XD

[cyaxrex]

I’ve had a couple of buyers recently who seem to be confused in regard to what copywriting is, as opposed to what copyrighting a product or tagline is.

One of these people requested that I add copyright symbols next to phrases like ‘10% off’ in their article and I think that they actually think that by doing this, no one else in the world will ever again be able to use that phraseology but them.

Anyway, since I get penalized by Fiverr for canceling orders, the days of my saying ‘Sorry, but do you realize that you are a complete nutter?’ Are far behind me. This being the case, I have been delivering all such work. All I can do is hope that the buyers in question don’t try to get their money back when they realize that they haven’t actually acquired the sole intellectual right to use words like ‘trousers’ for $10.

As for the world ending conspiracy theorist, there is a pretty well-regarded conspiracy blogger who uses Fiverr. I know this because this person threw a hissy fit when I said that I wouldn’t be interested in writing 1,000-word articles every day and signing an NDA for their budget of $5 per article.

I toy with the idea of exposing them and taking them down one day but I’ll save that for when I need a big marketing boost.

[prroducer99plus]

I’ve had a couple of buyers recently who seem to be confused in regard to what copywriting is, as opposed to what copyrighting a product or tagline is.

One of these people requested that I add copyright symbols next to phrases like ‘10% off’ in their article and I think that they actually think that by doing this, no one else in the world will ever again be able to use that phraseology but them.

Anyway, since I get penalized by Fiverr for canceling orders, the days of my saying ‘Sorry, but do you realize that you are a complete nutter?’ Are far behind me. This being the case, I have been delivering all such work. All I can do is hope that the buyers in question don’t try to get their money back when they realize that they haven’t actually acquired the sole intellectual right to use words like ‘trousers’ for $10.

As for the world ending conspiracy theorist, there is a pretty well-regarded conspiracy blogger who uses Fiverr. I know this because this person threw a hissy fit when I said that I wouldn’t be interested in writing 1,000-word articles every day and signing an NDA for their budget of $5 per article.

I toy with the idea of exposing them and taking them down one day but I’ll save that for when I need a big marketing boost.

Well yeah if Fiverr going to get mad and bop you for canceling obviously stupid and misunderstood orders, then take the money and run. If there’s an issue, refer them to their own warning they gave about not canceling on any orders despite good reason for their cancelation 😑

As far as conspiracy theorist, if he/she was outsourcing that work, the $5 budget was to turn the most profit… but it didn’t really make sense considering that you sell on the same platform and you could clearly see what she was doing. Genius 😄

[erinsaville]

Of the orders I actually completed, I don’t have anything that’s super weird. I did rewrite someone’s fetish story once. It was…quite graphic.

I do really want to know about how some requests in the BR section were eventually completed though. Most of the really weird stuff comes up in the creative writing section. I can’t think of anything that’s outright bizzare off the top of my head (aka so outlandish that I couldn’t even explain it), but one that always stuck with me was an extremely detailed outline of a children’s story that went from whimsical to a super heavy-handed moral tale about the goods of traditional families and the evils of divorces and single parents.

Then, of course, there’s all the fetish stuff, whether it’s about sexy wrestling, humiliating genderbending superheroes, and the classic dead girls’ feet. I wonder if those people ever find a writer who can do their fetishes justice. From what I’ve seen, erotica and horror seem to be in pretty high demand, at least among the people who approach me.

Whew. I’m a creative and content writer and so far the only story I’ve been asked for is a short ghost story along the lines of the sixth sense. I feel like I may have dodged a colossal bullet here…