Who are Typically Your Worst Writing Clients?

[cyaxrex]

Calling all writers. Who are your worst clients and why?

Mine are basically liars. - Bad liars. In my case, this means buyers who want a sales copy or blog post which they hope will sell a new kind of product or service which no one will ever buy because it’s so transparently fake.

At present, I’m writing an article about a new kind of cryptocurrency which is going to be the next Bitcoin - Providing that people send $100 to (insertbuyersnamehere)@gmail.co to get it.

See. 99.99% of sentient life on planet Earth will identify this as a scam. Sadly, the buyer isn’t able to appreciate this. Worse, they are the kind who will ask for countless revisions. In their mind, after all, no one can really describe just how incredible their new product or service is.

Of course, I don’t just get buyers like this on my crypto gig. Other buyers who I hate working with for the same reason include:

• Multilevel marketing people
• Self-help and life coach people
• Health & fitness supplement people
• People with generally appalling business ideas

[legacine]

Calling all writers. Who are your worst clients and why?

Mine are basically liars. - Bad liars. In my case, this means buyers who want a sales copy or blog post which they hope will sell a new kind of product or service which no one will ever buy because it’s so transparently fake.

At present, I’m writing an article about a new kind of cryptocurrency which is going to be the next Bitcoin - Providing that people send $100 to (insertbuyersnamehere)@gmail.co to get it.

See. 99.99% of sentient life on planet Earth will identify this as a scam. Sadly, the buyer isn’t able to appreciate this. Worse, they are the kind who will ask for countless revisions. In their mind, after all, no one can really describe just how incredible their new product or service is.

Of course, I don’t just get buyers like this on my crypto gig. Other buyers who I hate working with for the same reason include:

• Multilevel marketing people
• Self-help and life coach people
• Health & fitness supplement people
• People with generally appalling business ideas

• Self-help and life coach people
• Health & fitness supplement people

I’d really like for you to elaborate on these two in particular, if possible.

My worst clients in theory (I say ‘in theory’ because this has yet to happen, but I’m sure it will eventually) are clients who would expect something I write to achieve a particular result.

This is why, for example, I’ve been reluctant to offer a Gig where I write plans of action for Amazon suspension appeals… because if for whatever reason the suspension isn’t lifted, I’m all but guaranteed to be on the business end of a post - completion cancellation or chargeback. I’d rather charge based on work performed, and nothing else.

[md0000]

People who outsource jobs they got from a third party
Not so long ago, I had client who said: “It’s not that your articles are bad, but they are not as I want them to be.” By the way, this was an argument to bargain about the price, because I was stupid enough to accept to write before client placed an order. Maybe he/she didn’t outsource the job, but my gut feeling tells me he/she did.

Can you lower the price a bit? kind of people

Buyers from certain parts of the world
That’s all I’m going to say on this one.

Those who ask for a revision because “article lacks the juices”
I don’t read minds. If you know exactly how an article should look like, you should write it yourself.

[hanshuber16]

People who outsource jobs they got from a third party

Not so long ago, I had client who said: “It’s not that your articles are bad, but they are not as I want them to be.” By the way, this was an argument to bargain about the price, because I was stupid enough to accept to write before client placed an order. Maybe he/she didn’t outsource the job, but my gut feeling tells me he/she did.

Can you lower the price a bit? kind of people

Buyers from certain parts of the world

That’s all I’m going to say on this one.

Those who ask for a revision because “article lacks the juices”

I don’t read minds. If you know exactly how an article should look like, you should write it yourself.

If you know exactly how an article should look like, you should write it yourself.

Either that… Or they should be very specific in what they are looking for 😉

[rebekahgillian]

People who order one thing, and really want another.
I have a few different gigs on my profile, and while most people understand the differences between them, I’ve had a few clients who order a gig because it’s cheaper, only for them to ask me to do something I offer at a more expensive price. Sometimes I’m able to compromise with clients, but sometimes, clients are adamant that I’ll do what they want because “writing isn’t really that hard, is it?”, leaving me no choice but to cancel the order.

People who demand you do something, and then get aggressive when you say you can’t
I hate confrontation. I’ve become slightly better at dealing with it since becoming a freelancer, but I remain strictly professional so that I can avoid it wherever possible. There’s also going to be those clients, however, who refuse to accept no for an answer. I had one client talking to me a few months ago who proceeded to talk badly about another freelancer, and when I said I couldn’t work with them because I had a full schedule (warning signs were going off in my head, too), they got really aggressive with me and started telling me I was a rubbish freelancer and “probably didn’t know how to write”, too.

"I could get this service from another Fiverr seller much cheaper"
Why are you contacting me and not one of the cheaper Fiverr sellers, then? I usually handle this professionally by explaining why I charge what I do, and what they can expect for the extra money they pay.

As a disclaimer, the vast majority of the people who contact me and/or end up hiring me for work are extremely polite and professional, and I’m extremely lucky in that respect.

[cyaxrex]

• Self-help and life coach people
• Health & fitness supplement people

I’d really like for you to elaborate on these two in particular, if possible.

My worst clients in theory (I say ‘in theory’ because this has yet to happen, but I’m sure it will eventually) are clients who would expect something I write to achieve a particular result.

This is why, for example, I’ve been reluctant to offer a Gig where I write plans of action for Amazon suspension appeals… because if for whatever reason the suspension isn’t lifted, I’m all but guaranteed to be on the business end of a post - completion cancellation or chargeback. I’d rather charge based on work performed, and nothing else.

I’d really like for you to elaborate on these two in particular, if possible.

And risk the wrath of worldwide self-help and health supplement wackos? I don’t think so…

That said, what the hell.

Self-Help & Life Coach People

In my case, I get nobodies who have written awful books and/or simply decided one day to tell other people how to live their lives. That’s fine. Good for them if they can pull it off. However, these types also seem to communicate very passive aggressively.

Decline a discount request and you get things like:

“I suppose how you do business where you’re from is a little different.”

Either this or, “we were quoted a little less by another seller. I’ll let you look at what they offered us and we’ll go from there.” - Followed by a screenshot of a mek-seller on BR offering $5.

It’s always different but there is always something.

Health & Fitness Supplement People AKA Mial Order Murderers

Again, this is probably because this is Fiverr. However, the health supplement people I get should (for the most part) be locked up. Most of them don’t know what is in their supplements. Worse, many want the ‘benefits’ of toxic ingredients known to kill people exemplified rather than glossed over.

Of course, not all self-help and supplement people are off their trolley. I have had some amazing clients. However, you do start to notice somrthing of a trend after a while.

[beckywrites]

The constant revision monster. I have one who I write consistently for, and whenever I submit her work, I plan for an extra half hour the next day to edit it for her. She loves what I do, but always comes up with “And another thing, could you mention…” She is a regular, and pays very well, so I just grit my teeth and bear it.

Also, the “I didn’t sign up for this” chameleon. They order something, then just keep adding to it as it goes. It starts simply enough: Write a 1500 word article about artichokes." Then, it just keeps getting better…“Reference the Great Artichoke War of 1908 with some quotes from Captain Carrot.” A few hours later, you get another update. “Link Artichokes to aliens.” With each addition, the hopes of finding ANYTHING relevant to what they ask dwindles significantly. Then, as a final parting shot…"Please add the following keywords: “Artichokes are in America so long, Females who loves artichoke in dailys cars rider, and artichokes birth day in the sweltering heat of the midday sun on June 36th. (please use each at least once in headings, and twice in body of article).” All for $5 or $10. Using a cancellation is, as I found out, harmful, and delivering less than what is expected isn’t a good idea, so it’s our job to fluff pieces about artichokes with impossible long tail keywords and no research information available.

Three days later, you emerge from your cave, successfully clutching your $10…oh, wait, $8, and even more knowledgeable about artichokes than you ever wanted to be. The dogs aren’t fed, the kids have just graduated from college (they were in preschool before you started) and your house was blown away by a tornado.

Five star rating makes it all worth it.

[vicvera450]

People who outsource jobs they got from a third party

Not so long ago, I had client who said: “It’s not that your articles are bad, but they are not as I want them to be.” By the way, this was an argument to bargain about the price, because I was stupid enough to accept to write before client placed an order. Maybe he/she didn’t outsource the job, but my gut feeling tells me he/she did.

Can you lower the price a bit? kind of people

Buyers from certain parts of the world

That’s all I’m going to say on this one.

Those who ask for a revision because “article lacks the juices”

I don’t read minds. If you know exactly how an article should look like, you should write it yourself.

I totally agree with you. Most buyers expect you to write what’s on their mind, when all they provide is a brief, " I want an engaging write up that would draw people to my blog etc" and when you are done, they start telling you to put this, put that, and even end up cancelling.

That’s the main reason I deleted my blog posts and commercial script gigs. Now I have peace of mind. 😆

[cyaxrex]

The constant revision monster. I have one who I write consistently for, and whenever I submit her work, I plan for an extra half hour the next day to edit it for her. She loves what I do, but always comes up with “And another thing, could you mention…” She is a regular, and pays very well, so I just grit my teeth and bear it.

Also, the “I didn’t sign up for this” chameleon. They order something, then just keep adding to it as it goes. It starts simply enough: Write a 1500 word article about artichokes." Then, it just keeps getting better…“Reference the Great Artichoke War of 1908 with some quotes from Captain Carrot.” A few hours later, you get another update. “Link Artichokes to aliens.” With each addition, the hopes of finding ANYTHING relevant to what they ask dwindles significantly. Then, as a final parting shot…"Please add the following keywords: “Artichokes are in America so long, Females who loves artichoke in dailys cars rider, and artichokes birth day in the sweltering heat of the midday sun on June 36th. (please use each at least once in headings, and twice in body of article).” All for $5 or $10. Using a cancellation is, as I found out, harmful, and delivering less than what is expected isn’t a good idea, so it’s our job to fluff pieces about artichokes with impossible long tail keywords and no research information available.

Three days later, you emerge from your cave, successfully clutching your $10…oh, wait, $8, and even more knowledgeable about artichokes than you ever wanted to be. The dogs aren’t fed, the kids have just graduated from college (they were in preschool before you started) and your house was blown away by a tornado.

Five star rating makes it all worth it.

Also, the “I didn’t sign up for this” chameleon. They order something, then just keep adding to it as it goes. It starts simply enough: Write a 1500 word article about artichokes." Then, it just keeps getting better…“Reference the Great Artichoke War of 1908 with some quotes from Captain Carrot.” A few hours later, you get another update. “Link Artichokes to aliens.” With each addition, the hopes of finding ANYTHING relevant to what they ask dwindles significantly. Then, as a final parting shot…"Please add the following keywords: “Artichokes are in America so long, Females who loves artichoke in dailys cars rider, and artichokes birth day in the sweltering heat of the midday sun on June 36th. (please use each at least once in headings, and twice in body of article).” All for $5 or $10. Using a cancellation is, as I found out, harmful, and delivering less than what is expected isn’t a good idea, so it’s our job to fluff pieces about artichokes with impossible long tail keywords and no research information available.

I recently had an article like this which stated of as: “I need an article about wine merchants in town. Wine merchants in town is the keyword I need using.”

What town? Are you a wine merchant? If so, what wine do you sell? Do you sell online? Do you have a real store?

Needless to say the buyer was dumbfounded by my questions. However, as things went on it became a case of: “Please focus on Gloucester in the UK.” Followed by: “We don’t stock dessert wines.” Followed best of all with: “Please talk more about our selection of whisky decanters and gifts.” - Literally, WHAT?

I raised my prices after that debacle.